Snooki = The Data Analyst (chaotic dashboards at 2 AM 🍹)

Pauly D = The Data Engineer (yelling “WHO BROKE PROD?!” 🎧)

The Situation = The Data Scientist (clean, train, deploy = his GTL 🏋️‍♂️)

JWoww = The BI Developer (Power BI dashboards that could start fights 💅)

Vinny = The ML Engineer (quietly deploying recommenders 🤖)

Sammi = The Chief Data Officer (just wants consistent KPIs 😭)

Ronnie = The DBA (don’t touch prod or we fight 🔥)